fuck you ***** you cnut

welcome back, gentle reader

i am a player.

my chat got revoked. you know where.

cunts

Hello ResdentEvil,
We are writing to inform you that we have suspended your chat privilege for 3 hours as a result of your chat on 2009/08/12. The use of vulgarity when addressing another player is not allowed. When asterisks are seen during chatting, it is a warning that what is being put into the chatbox is not allowed. Using spaces or other characters, or otherwise defeating the censor is a violation of the Card Room Rules. Your chat privilege will be reinstated automatically once the suspension period is over. There is no need to write to support. Our goal at ********** is to be a fun place to play, where everyone can feel comfortable. Abuse and other disruptions to the games takes away from everyone's enjoyment, and therefore will not be tolerated. We thank you for your cooperation.
Regards,********** Chat Moderation Team

The following chat was observed

lol who the fk is red .... :)
you fkn animal !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
lol who the fk is red .... :)
you fkn animal !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
typical fkn shortie calls
fcuking river
get some chips you short fcuking stakker

some people are so so fcuking sensitive (are you listening, honey ?)

true blonde - pt 1

welcome back, gentle reader

sure you have seen it, fucking idiots abound

PokerStars Game #29367818472, Omaha Hi/Lo Pot Limit ($0.01/$0.02), 2009/06/14 Table 'Houzeau V'
Seat 8: ResdentEvil ($3 in chips)

PokerStars Game #29367818472, Omaha Hi/Lo Pot Limit ($0.01/$0.02), 2009/06/14 Table 'Houzeau V'
Seat 8: ResdentEvil ($16.88 in chips)

really, what can you say

thanks :)

strike 3 - pt3

welcome back, gentle reader

omfg it gets worse. any of you donkeys have a clue ??

PokerStars Tournament #99227279, No Limit Hold'em
Buy-In: $0.10
360 players
Total Prize Pool: $36.00
Tournament started - 2008/07/31 - 16:26:29 (ET)

Dear ResdentEvil,
You finished the tournament in 2nd place.
A $6.00 award has been credited to your Real Money account.
You earned 72.99 tournament leader points in this tournament.

creamed by a pl08 donkey, come on people !!

Suburban Relapse - SS and the B's - Polydor, 1978

welcome back, gentle reader.

just in case you think i am getting ideas above my station.

I can play piss-poor-poker-with-my-eyes-wide-open ...

Board [7d As Ad 6s 3h]
ResdentEvil: shows [6c 7c 2d 7s] ....... aw come on, its the hammer
(HI: a full house, Sevens full of Aces; LO: 7,6,3,2,A) ...... and look where that got me
bsinger_1: shows [5s Ts 4s 6h]
(HI: a straight, Three to Seven; LO: 6,5,4,3,A) ....... nice low
luckyharry2: shows [Ah 5c 3s Ks]
(HI: a full house, Aces full of Threes; LO: 7,6,5,3,A) ....... oops ! my thats a big one ...
luckyharry2 collected $5.75 from pot
bsinger_1 collected $5.75 from pot


Board [3c Qh 5c Qd 9h]
cookthecook: checks ResdentEvil: bets $1 ....... fold please ... ah, you call ...
bsinger_1: folds
TiburonSE: folds
cookthecook: calls $1
*** SHOW DOWN ***
ResdentEvil: shows [Ad 7s Kd 2s] (HI: a pair of Queens)
cookthecook: shows [8d Jc Jd Ac] (HI: two pair, Queens and Jacks)
cookthecook collected $10 from pot


Board [8c 2s 9s Qd 5c]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
FrJackHacket: shows [3d 9d Ac Jd] (HI: a pair of Nines; LO: 8,5,3,2,A)
ResdentEvil: shows [3c 9c Qh 4c]
(HI: two pair, Queens and Nines; LO: 8,5,4,3,2) ....... if you choose to play trash
bsinger_1: shows [7c As 3h 8s] (HI: a pair of Eights; LO: 8,5,3,2,A)
ResdentEvil collected $8 from pot ....... wow ! in fact double wow !!
bsinger_1 collected $4 from pot
FrJackHacket collected $4 from pot


Board [4d Qd 8d 8c Ac]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
luckyharry2: shows [Ad 2d Qs 8h] (HI: a full house, Eights full of Aces)
luckyharry2 collected $12 from pot
Seat 1: ResdentEvil (small blind) mucked [Td 9d 4h 2c] ....... yes, i mucked out of sheer embarassment

see ? see ? easy as falling off a fucking bike ... again

Colt Peacemaker .45 - pt 1a

welcome back, gentle reader.

cannot believe i have let it slip so badly and not posted for a week !

lets get the poker out the way first.

been running this week with the $1 45 man mtt donkaments at FT. think i've managed about ten or so and it aint pretty. a combination of bad play and suck out city !
for the record, i have only managed one in the money and that was second place.
i'm sure some of you have experience of these things, but as a prime example, here is a quite unbelievable 5-way all-in ...... ( and no, i resisted calling before you ask ) ...... this is early doors, the five combatants all have 1500 ish chips !! so the winner rockets into the lead with t7,500 ......

AA v 88 v J3s v KTs v 99 ...... so who won ?

answer forthcoming later, i am off for some dinner :))

...... well the guy with J3 obviously ... ended up with the str8, involving the 3 mind and not his J :)

and a quick resume of the beats i have taken
my A-rag v T3 ...... he rivered the 3
my AKs v ATo ...... a ten on the flop, is that a beat or just a coinflip ? ( felt bad ! )
my KQ v AJ ...... a Q on the flop and in went the chips, the ace arrived on the river
my AA v K8o .... wtf ?? ...... K on the flop and the 8 on the turn
and of course my AJ v 66 ...... flop 45J ... turn 7 ... gawd damn 3 on the river

lol, checked a few HH and there are a fair few more beats ! but i wont bore you any longer.

played 9 so far (36 to go) best place 2nd :) worst place 29th :(

*******
poker players may stop here. the rest of this is a general ramble.
*******

not exactly a standout month, real life has thrown a few my way ...

the exhaust snapped on my car :( took it to National, guy puts it up on the ramp, shows me where the break is ... on the engine side of the joint ... fcuk ... so i need a new rear section and mid section ....... £178 ... fcuk !

H says, the washing machine drum not turning. easy, the belt has fallen off. and it had. got the bugger back on ... test wash and spin .... machine fills with water, drum turns, result ! ....... machine fills with more water ?? but hey, the drum still turns ... machine fills with more water ... oh fcuk .... and finally fills with more water, up past door level !! bottle went and i turned it off, set it to drain, which thankfully it did ... and the belt fell off, again :(
looked like the main board was gubbed. looked up the price, getting on for £100 ... plus someone to fit ... and if it was not the main board ? bugger that, new machine:( please ....... £230 ... fcuk !
so no washing for a week ... 3 kids ??? ... hard to describe how much all that washing looks like ... chinese laundry, anyone ??

did i mention my eldest slashed his knee ? while helping daddy take apart some metal shelving from the garage. right across his kneecap ... ouch !! 2 hours in A&E is a long time to amuse a 5 year old ! the nice doc cleaned it and glued it and no tetanus ? anti-tetanus ? jag required, thank the stars.
positive i mentioned that before.

had to laugh, tho it nearly killed me, and admit defeat ! need to remove 16 concrete paving slabs from the drive and replace with decorative chippings ( help sell the house, apparently ). turned out way to much physical labour for this unfit git ... any idea how much a 3' x 2' concrete paving slab weighs ? .... managed four of 'em, gotta break 'em up to get them in the car and off to the dump ... gave up for fear of doing myself srious harm ! now need to look in the local rag for some "help"

enough is enough, roll on october ! a live game, somewhere, with ra trout !!

any and all welcome ... to Acorn's that is :))