fancy a quickie ?

welcome back, gentle reader.

yeah, me too is the answer. unfortunately this past week has been the wrong kind ... only sharp exits from tourneys, meh

well, the table finally appeared here ... lol sometimes i wish i hadn't bothered

last sundays game i played my exit hand beautifully ...
i limped in and the sb completes and ... the bb mrC ... raises ...wheeee :)
so i re-raise all-in, damn, should have flat called and pushed the flop, cough cough
anyway mrC uses his time, eventually calls,
my 99 v his AT ... i hit my set on the flop ... w00t ... he hit his straight on the turn, bugger

last nights britBlogger challenge game had not one but two special guests
non other than mr mookie and canada's first lady
as ever my timing was immaculate ... grrrrr
mookie was short, Kat had me covered

they are sb and bb ... time to make a move, a wee steal, dont mind a caller ... b00m

straight into Kats' gawd damned bullitts ....... ooops

during this i was playing some freeroll MillionPoundChallenge, 300 odd runners and only one $500 prize. anyway, got down to two tables, tried to steal while short and ran into JJ, fawk me

oh there was a good ending to last night. playing pl08 cash, lost half a buy-in with the usual nonsense ... A2 no good on high boards ... QQTJ no good on low boards ... yawn
managed to claw it back thru sheer patience and finally finally hitting a few hands ... my roi ?? a mind blowing 5%

btw if there is one tourney we all like to win, its a forum game. took down the ukff stud8 game last friday, i think ??
played quite well, my hands held up, they folded when i had air :) for most of that one i had the pleasure of teaulc at my table, gg sir.

4 months later

welcome back, gentle reader.

sorry folks, very little poker content but seems i missed a real fucking soup drama elsewhere.
poor old jones got himself ... well, stiffed, almost. i do believe he is sorted but poker4ever (no link as he deleted another blog !) name's now mud !!

elsewhere this fish has changed his mind again ! lol please stop, you're killing me. every time a new idea comes along i jump on board or i use my own variation of said idea, meh ! all good clean fun, generally not good for the bankroll *)

my own poker has been sailing along ...... in a fucking stormy sea, if you get my drift ... up an down like a whores knickers ... am i allowed to say that ? surely its a bit non pc ? fuck it, whatever.
so some minor successes.

$5 + $0.50 Tournament Fixed Omaha H/L
Buy-In: $5.00 + $0.50 160 players
You finished the tournament in 16th place.There has been $8.00 added to your account.

Buy-In: $0.10 lmfao the dark side again :)
360 players
You finished the tournament in 7th place.A $1.30 award has been credited ...

Buy-In: 50 FPP
936 players
$1000.00 added
You finished the tournament in 28th place.A $3.00 award has been credited ...

ha ha ha 900+ runners and i blagged a top 30 finish ?? fucking outstanding i say :)

as ever, i cannot leave pl08 alone ... and why the fuck should i ...

PL Omaha H/L
Buy-In: $10.00 + $1.00
152 players
You finished the tournament in 12th place.There has been $22.80 added to your account.

ok enough of my heroic exploits :)

trawling thru my (junk )email, found this poukker , which i did join, just for the added bonus tournaments !! lmfao dont hold your breath though ! when they get 2000 members and the freerolls kick off ... just dont say i didn't tell you.

holy fucking shit, added a new link and tried it out .... fucking awesome !! its the first link under "linkettes" ... grieta, if only u paid me baby !! i would spam the world ... then again the more people i tell ... the more people might join suggested tournaments ... fuck me, did i just shoot myself in the foot ??

speaking of such. in newcastle for a couple of days and missed battleOfTheBloggers tuesday game, meh

and i see mrProlific is , well, anything but, drop by and give him a kick !!

really-hope-he-did-not-fall-off-his-fucking-boat

and on a cheerier note, for the amagays and puds, really really N.S.F.W.

( ps i cannot claim any credit for the redhead, its al Al's fault ... lucky bastard )

Take your weapon !

Good. I can feel your anger. I am defenseless.
Take your weapon !
Strike me down with all your hatred, and your journey towards the dark side will be complete.

ha ha ha knew i would get to use that great line (not so great movie) again, see cell1919 doubt me not :)

ok been in training for this damned battle of the bloggers ... oh yeah i have been to the dark side ... hopefully the jedi mind trick works on the virtual felt

Full Tilt Poker Tournament #58167199 Early Double - A NL Hold'em
Buy-In: $5.00 + $1.00
1290 players
Total Prize Pool: $6450.00
Start Date: August 15 4:00 PM ET

Dear dD,
You finished the tournament in 161st place.
There has been $8.38 added to your account.


and Regulators, please take note *)

PokerStars Tournament #100875579,
HORSE
Buy-In: $3.00/$0.30
320 players
Total Prize Pool: $960.00
Tournament started - 2008/08/15 - 17:45:00 (ET)

Dear ResdentEvil,
You finished the tournament in 16th place.
A $12.48 award has been credited to your Real Money account.
You earned 67.61 tournament leader points in this tournament.

as ever its not the money but the fact i outlasted and sometimes outplayed 300 other cowboys.


Full Tilt Poker Tournament #58163408 $10 + $1 Tournament PL Omaha H/L
Buy-In: $10.00 + $1.00
137 players
Total Prize Pool: $1370.00
Start Date: August 15 3:15 PM ET

Dear dD,
You finished the tournament in 14th place.
There has been $17.12 added to your account.

tough pl08 game, just pleased to last the distance, fell short at death though :)

battle of the britBloggers - pt1

welcome back, gentle reader.

i have been roused from my lethargy by these fine gentlemen.

Al and mrC and acorn

if you dont already know then pop on over for the full details, but here is a brief summary as i understand it.

3 games a week for the next four weeks which includes the britBlogger as a points scoring game. all games played on fullTilt, yeah the britBlogger is (temporarily??) moving home. its a league system and the two highest points scorers win the prizes ... all expense paid trip to the big smoke for the live recording of some cash game or other :)

btw it all kicks off tomorrow night at 19.00 our time ... wtf mrC ?? ... earlier than usual which, actually, might not be a bad thing. there will be a healthy turnout for tomorrows game as the winner gets an entry into an FTOPS event ... wow !!

all games a measly $5 buy-in usual password "donkament"

dont ask me for help finding these fucking things as i have serious probs finding them myself. the fullTilt lobby is not a friendly place to find a friendly game ... 'stars has us spoiled by showing the tourney name ... but i found it and if i can ... you can !!

oh ffs here .......

full Tilt (tournaments, private)
58147237 Brit Blogger Challenge
( server time 14.00 ) Hold'em NL $5 + $0.50

faulty towers - pt1

fuck me i am livid !!

blagged 3rd place here .... now she may be a very very good player, but fuck me she made some fucking loose calls .... and one of her loose calls consigned me to third ... the worst part is, i was at her table for over an hour .... she knew i was fucking onto her ... i raise she fucking folds ... fuck fuck fuck

Full Tilt Poker Tournament #57220032
$10 + $1 Tournament

PL Omaha H/L

Buy-In: $10.00 + $1.00

137 players
Total Prize Pool: $1370.00
Start Date: August 6 3:15 PM ET

You finished the tournament in 3rd place

honestly, i am absolutely fucking livid .......

next time, bitch

strike 3 - pt3

welcome back, gentle reader

omfg it gets worse. any of you donkeys have a clue ??

PokerStars Tournament #99227279, No Limit Hold'em
Buy-In: $0.10
360 players
Total Prize Pool: $36.00
Tournament started - 2008/07/31 - 16:26:29 (ET)

Dear ResdentEvil,
You finished the tournament in 2nd place.
A $6.00 award has been credited to your Real Money account.
You earned 72.99 tournament leader points in this tournament.

creamed by a pl08 donkey, come on people !!

strike 2 - pt2

welcome back, gentle reader

PokerStars Tournament #99203228, No Limit Hold'em
Buy-In: $0.10
360 players
Total Prize Pool: $36.00
Tournament started - 2008/07/31 - 14:22:29 (ET)

Dear ResdentEvil,
You finished the tournament in 4th place.
A $2.80 award has been credited to your Real Money account.
You earned 51.61 tournament leader points in this tournament.

you lot should be thouroughly ashamed, ffs

hang your head.

Book of Revelation

welcome back, gentle reader

i dont often post this early in the week as i am usually too tired after a herd weekends graft ... graft=beer+poker+late nights :) this weekend was no different ... lmfao !! i wish *)
started well enough, Acorn phoned and asked if i fancied a wee live game over at his cousins. who was i to refuse ? he was doing the driving :) there were only five of us and it was a £5 rebuy with Acorn and i ending heads up

with his AJ v my A9 .... a 9 on the turn, big cheer .... J on the fawking river boooooo !!

i'll fire this piece in here 'cause i cant remember the exact timeline .... but according to my stats, blog type stats that is, i had been getting over a dozen (wow) visits a day ... with nary a comment in sight .... not surprising you say, considering some of the drivel i write :)
i have to say i was very curious as to whom these visitors were. then i was talking to the mrs on the phone .... lots of stuff came out, but the pertinent one was, you guessed it, she reads my blog ... fawk me !! the more i thought about it the less surprised i was. the troubling thought was she was reading but not telling, go figure, huh. anyway, she was less than impressed with a few things, blog related, but so be it, i have nothing to hide.
my main thought was, yey ! the truth is out there ! (x-files theme tune just rattled thru your brain, didn't it) at last, perhaps a new beginning for us ?? her idea of a new beginning was not quite my idea ... she never spoke to me for three fucking days.

i am very much a if-you-might-not-like-the-answer-dont-ask-the-damned-question type of person and that goes for this blog. dont like it ? dont read it. ( then again, perhaps
Rosie is correct "you are a man and therefor a cunt" )
of course, whats written here, could of course be misconstrued, misinterpreted and just taken the wrong way, then again, many a "funny" comment or line in a chat box has started more than one blog war !!

if in doubt, seek clarification :)

so what happened saturday ... lol tried playing whack-a-mole-nlhe .... thats right .... multi-tabling where there are more games going than you have available screen space .... lol the table pops up and whack ! decision time, in like 3 secs before the next one pops up ! great fun but i do need a larger bankroll to get to grips with it :)

sunday was a rTr admin v us v serfs or along those lines. my excuse for not winning ? by the time i shoved ... my 44 dominated Lou's AK :) i think the obligatory A fell somewhere ... i was feeling like shit and really only wanted to go and lie down :) honestly.
there was one very interesting hand i played against this pro fish and his comment "it doesn't make sense" when i bet the river, made me mighty happy. not everyday a pro comments like that :)

Level III (25/50) - 9-max
4: ResdentEvil (2515 in chips)
Seat 5: simonjjj (2230 in chips)

*** HOLE CARDS *** [Jd Th]

*** FLOP *** [Kd 4d Qd]

ResdentEvil: bets 50
simonjjj: raises 150 to 200
ResdentEvil: calls 150

*** TURN *** [Kd 4d Qd] [Ah]

ResdentEvil: checks
simonjjj: bets 300
ResdentEvil: raises 300 to 600
simonjjj: calls 300

*** RIVER *** [Kd 4d Qd Ah] [3d]

ResdentEvil: bets 600
simonjjj said, "dont make sense"
ResdentEvil said, "call :)"
simonjjj said, "should have shoved turn"
simonjjj said, "flopped 2 pr"
ResdentEvil said, ":))"
simonjjj: calls 600

*** SHOW DOWN ***
ResdentEvil: shows [Jd Th] (a flush, King high)

simonjjj said, ";dsijriuers"
simonjjj: mucks hand
ResdentEvil collected 2900 from pot
simonjjj said, "nh"
(btw he did indeed flop 2pr, but i would have called his shove :)

fuel55's gold - pt2

welcome back, gentle reader.

Full Tilt Poker Game #7236990751: $11 + $1 Sit & Go (Turbo) (55017895),
Table 1 - 300/600 - Pot Limit Omaha H/L - 19:05:08 ET - 2008/07/15

Seat 2: rockfish7 (4,318)
Seat 3: Vizsla-Dog (4,168)
Seat 6: V5877 (1,884)
Seat 7: koz31 (1,270)
Seat 9: dD (1,860)

dD posts the small blind of 300
rockfish7 posts the big blind of 600
The button is in seat #7

*** HOLE CARDS *** Dealt to dD [5h 5s 6h 8h]

Vizsla-Dog folds
V5877 folds
koz31 folds
dD calls 300
rockfish7 checks

*** FLOP *** [5d 5c 2h] ....... gin (trick is to keep him in)

dD checks .............................. check in case his low has been counterfeited
rockfish7 checks .................... damn

*** TURN *** [5d 5c 2h] [Kc]

dD checks ............................... lets hope he has caught something now
rockfish7 bets 600 ................. thats better
dD has 15 seconds left to act
dD raises to 1,260, and is all in ... he cant fold now, can he ?
rockfish7 has 15 seconds left to act
rockfish7 calls 660 ..................... excellent

dD shows [5h 5s 6h 8h]
rockfish7 shows [3c 9h Js 7s] ... wow !!!!

*** RIVER *** [5d 5c 2h Kc] [Jc]

dD shows four of a kind, Fives, for high
rockfish7 shows two pair, Jacks and Fives, for high
dD wins the pot (3,720) with four of a kind, Fives
No low hand qualified

presto knows no bounds.

The Dark Half - Stephen King, 1989

welcome back, gentle reader.

one bitch back, one bitch gone.

the removal guys came in on thursday, packed stuff in boxes for several hours, then left. on friday they returned, team handed, packed lots more stuff and this time loaded it all into their van, then they left, van included. sometime early saturday afternoon the van arrived at its destination in Englandshire. on sunday, i loaded the brood and the last of their stuff into the car and headed for their new home in Englandshire. 6 years, 3 kids, 0 help. enough was enough i guess, she missed her family. hopefully, back with her real friends and family, she will get some much needed help and support. on monday i got on the train and headed home, alone.
there are still a few things to be done to the house before it goes up for sale, great timing huh ? should get them done in a few weeks then try and get it sold and then ... well there a few things in the pipeline to allow me to transfer down south, so at the very least i will get to see the kids more often. i wonder if the enforced break will allow us two bitches to get our acts together ??

next time you whinge about the cost of petrol ...

When you cry for cheaper oil, do you know what you are really asking for? Gordon Brown has just shown us. He has unwittingly exposed the pipeline that runs from your petrol station to the poisoned people of the Niger Delta. The more you howl for cheap oil, the more they will be Shell-shocked into submission.
To understand, you need to know the story of the Niger Delta, a once lush land of mangrove swamps at the base of Nigeria. In the late 1950s, in the final days of British imperial rule, Shell's local subsidiary discovered it lay on top of vast pools of oil. Britain immediately became its number one user, with the US close behind. In the long decades since, more than $200bn worth of oil and gas has been pumped from beneath the Delta people's feet.
So you would imagine the Niger Delta must now be an oasis of riches, with its 30m people bathing in wealth. But no: they live with nothing and die by the age of 40. While the lifeblood of twenty-first century techno-life is pumped from their land, they live in the Stone Age, with no schools, no hospitals and barely any electricity. They have felt three effects from the petrol. Their land has been poisoned by oil spills; the fish they lived off have been turned into stunted, toxic rarities; and when they ask for compensation, they are shot at.

full article HERE

No doubt Brown will say the British soldiers would also provide human rights training to Nigerian soldiers. But the reason Nigerian soldiers are there is to suppress the local people so their oil can be seized. How do you slather human rights training on top of a mission like that?
An old woman from the Delta tries, in the new American documentary Sweet Crude, to talk directly to you. She says: "I'd like people all over the world to realise there's a segment of humanity suffering as a result of oil production – ordinary men, women, children. They should think about them and not think simply of energy. Think of us as people. That's more important than anything."
But while we are unrepentant junkies, howling for cheap petrol, will we be able to hear her?

retro - pt1

welcome back, gentle reader.

i suppose the first thing i should point out is my (meager) poker content has moved,

HERE

going to give it a try and see how things go. i can access the new blog during daylight hours if you catch my drift. the only problem so far is the fact that i do not have complete control over it. ie any template amendments have to be uploaded by rTr which is a bit of a bummer and a pain in the bummer, tbh. lol bet rTr think i am a pain in the a$$ wanting all the changes that i do !!

what do i do with this piece of bloggerdom ? lol don't worry, i wont delete it ... just be a little quieter, for a few months at any rate. come the start of august, i will have a little more time on my hands ...

but as they say, thats another story .......

( to be continued )

Twin Peaks - pt1

welcome back, gentle reader.

i am not sure it was wise to open the box !


fullTilt

Overall OPR Rank: 59,058 of 916,296
Full Tilt Poker OPR Rank: 16,353 of 273,989


partyPoker

Overall OPR Rank: n/a of 916,296
Party Poker OPR Rank: n/a of 46,554


pokerStars

Overall OPR Rank: 225,003 of 916,296
PokerStars OPR Rank: 120,279 of 497,355


room for improvement !!

FTSE 100 - pt1

welcome back, gentle reader.

oh man you gotta laugh. some people do monthly financial updates, hell some do it daily ! mine make such exciting reading i thought i'd better limit it to six monthly, in case the excitement of weekly updates would be to much for some.

so i had a trawl through my congrats emails and this is what i came up with. for those who like to cut to the chase, here is the summary.

i have not reloaded stars or fullTilt since christmas time. so the money on there is all profit, such as it is. both sites started at around $50 and i now have around a couple of hundred on each :)
not to bad for a recreational player and low stakes one at that. it would be more but i like to take shots, meh !

ignoring taking shots, my game has, i think, improved quite a bit, just need to reign in my dial-a-shot mentality. well the proof is in the pudding as they say ... was going to cut'n'paste the emails in but that even bored the arse off me ! so it would send my reader running to the hills ...

btw blame ukgatsby for the format :)

HORSE $35/$3 ..8 players - 1st $140.00 jan 08 - dial a shot goes right for once.
HORSE $3/$.30 ..352 players - 18th $8.45 feb 08
HORSE $3/$.30 ..520 players - 47th $6.24 feb 08
HORSE $5/$.50 ..108 players - 6th $24.30 mar 08
HORSE $5/$.50 ..112 players - 9th $12.32 mar 08
HORSE $50/$5 ..8 players - 2nd $120.00 mar 08 - dial a shot goes right ... almost.
HORSE $5/$.50 ..50 players - 1st $92.50 mar 08

march madness arrived = tilt & to many dial-a-shots = give it all back :(

pl08b $15/$1 ..18 players - 1st $108 april 08
pl08b $2/$.20 ...562 players - 35th $4.61 april 08
HORSE $5/$.50 ..60 players - 2nd $69 may 08
pl0 $10/$1 ..19 players - 1st $95 may 08
pl0 $10/$1 ..21 players - 1st $105 may 08
HORSE $5/$.50 ..85 players - 1st $133.88 may 08

$5 head hunter 7th $18.30 may 08
$x pl08 ?? ........ 1st $60 may 08 .... the email is corrupted
$4.40 SCALP collector 27th $11.16 in heads may 08
HORSE $5/$.50 ..94 players - 2nd $96.82 may 08
stud hi/lo $5/$.50 ..14 players - 1st $35 may 08
HORSE $10/$1 ...152 players - 11th $28.88 may 08

if you made it this far, well done.

at least you wont have to read another of these 'till christmas.

the last king of scotland - pt 2

welcome back, gentle reader

tha last king reigns, sweet.

i did not think there would be a part 2 ...

the fairy tale lives on ....

3 card brag - pt 1

welcome back, gentle reader

PokerStars Tournament #87288329, ( Saturdays With Dr. Pauly )
Pot Limit Omaha
Buy-In: $10.00/$1.00
19 players
Total Prize Pool: $190.00
Tournament started - 2008/05/10 - 16:20:00 (ET)

Dear ResdentEvil,
You finished the tournament in 1st place.
A $95.00 award has been credited to your Real Money account.
Congratulations!
Thank you for participating

just a matter of time before the Brits made an impact ...

the Quest - pt 1 (FTOPS viii)

welcome back, gentle reader.

just a quickie. won my first ever fT token by the proverbial mile, so you know how soft the game must have been.

i would dearly love to sat my way into ftops viii. don't hold your breath, since my playing time is extremely limited ... i may not even get the chance to play the token :(

as i said in my rTr post, i would like to tackle 3 of the events ... $900 buy-in ... ffs who am i kidding !! the one event i would play is of course the HORSE one ... which just happens to be the most expensive event, of course ... a mere $500 buy-in ...

anyone want to buy a piece of my a$$ .......

b00m ... back to reality ...

i'll let you know of any progress with my $26 token ...