Fuck you and you're fucking plan. I'm going to fucking bed.

welcome back

whiny bitch post alert, I will refrain from tl;dr , probably .... (and this post will be very quickly followed by another, less damaging post, in the vain hope that no cunt notices this one, lol)

Before we get to the bitch slapping put me downs, I played at the virtual felt last night. I made a pretty "serious" attempt at mass multi tabling. Seriously, with 16 tables open, I was putting whole tables on tilt with the unintended resulting lag that my attempt was causing. Good times -))

On a related note, I played one small field mtt as well. A forum game. Last nights was 2-7 NL single draw. I really like the forum games although I'm pretty sure I'm -EV in them. I do think I get a reasonable amount of respect in them and not too many of the regulars think I'm too fishy.
I can usually go deep in them .. this usually has a huge detrimental effect on my cash tables as I find myself overly concentrating on the forum game. (really ? you were out 13th from 15 runners last night - Ed) Last night was the exception. With the cash tables beeping away like a slot machine on fucking speed, I pretty much ignored the forum game. Missing decent starting hands and spots to steal pretty much left and right. I even failed to take into account the long blinds structure.
Into the second hour and still with a very playable stack, I thought "fuck, time to make some moves". You can see where that mistake got me. Shoving while drawing to a 7 low with one discard I pulled a Q, villain pulled T low, oops. Wrong play at the wrong fucking time, ouch.

And the cash tables ? Apart from tilting a load of people with my ineptitude, what a fucking roller coaster. Sadly, like their real life counterparts, more down than up. Like their real life counterparts, what a blast !
In fact, so much so, I failed to notice my "good friend" Daniel Negreanu sent me an email on behalf of 'stars ....

Dear ,

congratulations! You are now a SilverStar VIP until at least the end of next month

See ? See that ? We are such great buddies that the cunt has forgotten my name !! and he is not the only cunt who has forgotten my name !!

Before we get to one of last nights monster hands, the attainment of a third star on my fishy avatar, was pretty much out of the blue. I knew how many points I needed for silver but had pretty much accepted I would not be getting there this month. I had resigned myself to it being a bit Elvis Costello (if you're unfamiliar or to fucking lazy to find out, it's Less Than Zero)
In fact, the more I think about it, the more I think that last nights session was pretty fucking sic, well, as sic as it can be for a part time fish, lol.

I ran across a post which basically said "If you make the correct decision whilst playing a hand, then you will "win" the hand, regardless of the outcome" if I can find the original I'll post the link as its a very good article. The authors basic slant is to "win" at poker has nothing to do with dollar amounts but is all about making the correct decisions .. make enough of them an you might even make a few dollars along the way.

imho, I won this monster hand. Correct decision, wrong outcome.

It was quite unusual in that it was a pl08b table $25 buy-in. Up against a $30 stack and a $16 stack.
I get dealt 62AA ....
I limp in , big stack raises to 75c , shorty flats , I re-raise to $4 .. big stack re-pops it to $13 .. shorty pushes all-in for $16 .. with only $8 behind , I shove all-in -)) the big stack obv calls .... $64 pot -))
shorty decided 5KJ5 was good to go .... binks the full house, collects $46
me ? I collect the side pot of $15. The big stack had 3Q2A rainbow .. and a $7 stack.

And that concludes today's poker lesson, lol.

So, after last nights fun and games, I'll move right along to the serious shit ....

This post wont paint me in a particularly good light, and why should it ? Basically, I've let my family down over the past few years, I've just not been their for them. It's all too easy as a work away from home dad, to ignore the pressures they are under. This attempt to change these failings will fall on deaf ears. No surprise as I've generally failed in the past. Pretty sceptical myself but I have to start somewhere. As I've been told, actions speak louder than words. Time. for. some. action.

nemesis : when I look in the mirror, there he fucking is.

Stop enjoying yourself until you are debt free.
well, tomorrow is the start of a new month. As good a time as any to try and implement some life changes. Small changes, aimed at reducing my personal outgoings. Fancy a sandwich for lunch ? Make my fucking own. Paying corporate America is the height of my fucking laziness. The less money I waste, the more money available for family things -))

As I've said before, I'm not sure how this will affect my desire to play poker. Will I want to attempt to put some real volume in ? or will I think that this is a stupid computer game that is a complete and utter fucking waste of time ?

I hope its the former. On good days I'm pretty sure I'm a 6/10 on the poker skill tree -)) That translates to me thinking I'm just above average and good to go for .. oh, maybe a dollar an hour ??!!

and on that highest of high notes, I bid you adieu, sirs et madames.

pleasant dreams