welcome back.
I am NOT staying here ....
Working for the man, has its advantages, occasionally. I am staying here.
Room with a view ....
welcome back.
.... the bed won.
had a wtl;dfr (way to long;didn't fucking read) uber post lined up but .... the bed in my digs needed fixing. there were 3 nails sticking out where they really shouldn't have been. in fact, there should not be any nails ! wtf ?
its one of those cheap "pine" beds. a flatpack special. previous roomy obv broke the fucking thing and tried a bit of DIY to fix it. basically hammered in a load of fucking nails to re-attach the slat support rail to the main frame .... now, eddie the english was a lovely lovely lass, but, to put not to fine a point on it, she was a fat cunt. so at some point the slat support rail parted company from the frame, hence the botched DIY.
so i thought, easy, remove the 3 nails, DRILL three holes, insert 3 screws, job done .... err no. 17 nails and 8 screws later .... job done, fml
on a slight side note, my kids beds are the same basic design .... except my bed has nice round finnials atop the legs .... kids beds have SHARP wooden corners atop the bottom legs .... i know they are sharp, my lower legs will be used as evidence ( my testimony reads thus - after coming into contact with sharp corners, lots of "bastard, you fucking bastard" or arrrggghh cunt, you fucking cunt" while collapsing in various states of distress .... ).... my mrs reads this and the beds will be on the bonfire, H&S will be rounding up the manufacturer/designers for a very public flogging and our newly appointed lawer will be issuing a lawsuit for $10 million fucking dollars .... oh and if my kids actually hurt themself .... you seen my other half when she is really really angry ??
so already wtl;dfr.
and poker. well, wsop from pokerPeoplesPlace is all done. closest i got was one 2nd place in stud8 and one cash in a nlhe donkfest :) to be fair, i did run/play like the proverbial jackass in equal measure. and the cost of all that good clean fun was $85 and i won $55 .... now thats a result !!
doesn't time fly when you're having fun ! i've a $3 omaha tourney to play, laters.
pleasant dreams
welcome back.
just a quickie, sorry. sure I've mentioned this before .... but that game on FT is a motherfucking rake generating whore ! yup, tried it again last night and dropped a buy-in, bugger. should have known better than to play 6-max - why the fuck do they not have full ring O8 tables ? bastards.
I got half of it back playing standard full-ring, tyvm - please remind me not to try again, at least until I have a roll on FT ffs.
Not a lot to report. been playing the wsop most nights. all good fun. not won fuck all (two in the money, one of those a second spot). surprisingly, my stars roll still going in the right direction, although ever so slowly.
not bad considering most buy-ins are $5 and the fact i've only been playing the tourneys with no cash tables .... so i can concentrate, lmfao !
all the good its done, i'm gonna open some cash to keep tonights tournament company. might not be too bad an idea, since I'm "used" to multi tabling :)
tonight its RAZZ .... know what ? I've never played a RAZZ tourney, fml !!
pleasant dreams
welcome back.
this is an unashamed (poker) brag :)
played a few hands tonight. some good some bad, some downright redic. nature of the beast. i got involved with one of the reg's. as soon as the turn brought the flush, i new i was totally fucked. but i raised his bet, just in case .... and got 3/4 as expected. he did have a sterling hand and ever the gentleman, i told him so.
ResdentEvil said, "nh"
hobbes62 said, "its an honor to best you sir"
hobbes62 said, "i respect your game"
how fucking cool is that !
pleasant dreams
welcome back.
i had a tl,dr post lined up. the title speaks volumes. so the tl;dr will appear in dribs and drabs, lol
so i was going to post last night. but i drove (2 and a half hours) to york early o'clock monday morning, spent the morning in the office - reminds me of the old joke .... i dont mind working but that 8hr wait to go home is a bugger - last week i was on nights over preston way and i still had the paperwork. said paperwork needed to be given to the poor sap covering the works this week. so after lunch i drove over there (2 hours) and later that afternoon drove (2 hours) back to york !
so last nights post remained in my head as i was just too fucking tired.
for the last two years my home station has been york. been fairly lucky that at least half of that was spent on site / working from home :) got me in some serious hot water though, with project managers and line managers - they think you can run a civils job from a desk, luck my fife indeed. the next set of 30 odd sites would have kept me busy for the next 2 years (assuming i didn't get the fucking bullet) .... networkrail didn't give us the work but have asked their maintenance division to do it. here's hoping maintenance make a rip roaring fuckup of the works .. its 100% non life threatening if they do, since its not track or signalling related, its not even safety critical .. they fuck up, we might get the work back, yey !
so for the time being, i'm driving a desk, ugh. also had to start lodging thru the week .... its min 2hr drive each way ! from home to york. aside from me being completely and utterly fucked all the time, my bosses had taken a decidely dim view of my tavelling .... fair comment, i suppose .... i do have a company car after all.
still, my mrs now reckons i am a Company Man.
yeesh, after reading that I think I'm turning into waffles !! (way to fucking mild - Ed)
pleasant dreams
welcome back.
not sure wtf is going on but there have been a huge number of nlhe donkeys playing the penny 08 tables. I know they are nlhe donkeys .... they think a set of aces is good on a flushed, low board .... wtf ? seriously wtf ? ah well, its their pennies as the saying goes :)
micromania you say ? eh ? lol, certainly racks up the fpp's and us penny pincher's need all the help we can get. long may it continue ! the end of July you say ....
played a wee 08 private tourney (Spazz Radio ?, I think) at the weekend. only 2-3 tables and jus for fun. except i got it into my head that "this is my game, i wanna win". I'm not usually like that so it was all a bit weird. so time marches on, finally 5 of us left, I'm the huge chip leader .... other 4 had roughly 4k each and i'm on 15k and then theres a break. just as I stand up, the comment flashes into the chat box .... "Resdent not much good at the big stack" .... had that appeared a split second later I'd have missed it and been none the wiser ....
I typed "its Omaha, not fcuking nlhe", but I wisely didn't hit return. It's a forum game and a bit of fun so whats the point of upsetting peeps. really can't be arsed with the aggro tbh :)
anyway, I hit the perfect riposte by taking it down, thank you (for your wise comments:)
finally, finally managed another live game with zagga the donk, he he. get this .... 10k starting stack .... 15 minute blinds !!
did I cash ? did I fuck. did zagga cash ? did he fuck. did I outlast zagga ? did i fuck !! lol, so that makes me the donk ! all good clean fun .... except the view from zagg's seat, the youngish woman's arse was fucking HUGE, grossly fucking HUGE, ughh .... then again she was kinda big all over. and fuck me if she wasn't putting away a large plate of Indian food from the free buffet, double ugh. so that was zag's excuse .... mines ?
blinds 300/600 I have 16k, I raised to 1600 from mid (dont ask me, it was the std raise at my table) and the ladee on the button jams. i checked to see i had her covered and then called ....
my QQ v AQ .... yessss ........ ace on the turn, oh bugger
that was that, crippled with about 6bb I got moved to zag's table. blinds 800/1600 and two hands away from the bb I decided to shove and ran into (classic lol)
my 9T v JQ v AK .... nh,gg me
on the virtual felt, I got dealt quad aces :) that's the fourth time in as many weeks I've been dealt dqb, from the sublime to the redic !
pleasant dreams.
welcome back.
and this is the second (and only !!) time in a week, I've been dealt quads, spooky huh.
pleasant dreams
welcome back.
caught up with zagga again the other night. live poker had been arranged previously but his special visitor (no, not Nacho ffs) didn't have the moola after an expensive holiday .... somewhere nice, I hope, Big Chap !
nice too see you again mate, looking good .... a few extra pounds in tow, but hey, none of us getting any younger ! (that includes you zagga !) yes the same Big Chap who hosted the Glasgow live game, while living in the middle of nowhere .... and he's moved house too .... to another middle of nowhere !! some people might think you a little antisocial Big Chap lol :)
so no poker but the footie was on .... but so was THAT tennis match, lol. sublime to the redic but having watched so much of it, we just couldn't stop lol
and the bastards didn't have the decency to finish while we watched !! nh-gg-wp.
so the live poker has been postponed for a week and the Big Chap may or may not join us. come on mate, the more the merrier !
so my absolute last chance for live poker in Glasgow next week (zagga take note !) lets hope its a goer .... and I'm not gigli !
pleasant dreams
welcome back.
finally caught up with zagga last night. a few beers, the footie and a good chinwag, nacho too ! all in all a good night. he even treated me to 3 turbo's on party. he busted in one then crashed out the second when KK cracked his AA :(
he did get HU in his third but the fishy villain couldn't fold some trash which caught the flop, obv :(
thing is, zagga makes it look all to easy. always good to learn from someone who knows what they're doing ! good stuff.
after that i cycled (is it illegal to be over the limit on a push bike ??) off home and inspired by the great man, i fired up some micro cash 08 ....
actually played reasonably well, and over 200 hands I managed to come out ahead. roughly +180bb at the 2c level and +130bb at the 5c level.
hand of the evening ....
on a [Ks 7c 9c Ts Td] board my [Kc 3h Kh Qh] is good v [6s 7s 8c 8s]
.... and its not my fault the villain did not defend his turned straight :)
pleasant dreams.
moving house is a fucking ball ache .... especially during the world cup .... ah well, with no tv, I wont have to watch that fucking movie "Out of Africa" ....
pleasant dreams.
welcome baaaack.
(live game next week Zag, get you're arse in gear ffs :)
i'm in Aberdeen for a few nights. in a cheap hotel chain, advertised by a certain ex comedian. he may still claim to be such, but after hearing him voiceover a childrens tv series ....
the ******* *** chain are thieving fuckers.
£10 facking quid for 24hrs of internet access ! wtf ? seriously, wtf ?
their only saving grace, the Boddingtons is only £2.65 a pint. cheapest pint i've had in a hotel for many a year !
so, 4 pints or net access ....
right, where's that tv remote you thieving cunts.
welcome back.
seems i have been away for ages and now i have no idea where to begin ....
start with the important shit ? yeesh, there are a few items contesting that spot, or not, depending on your point of view :)
unless you're self employed, then "working for the man" is jolly important. well it should be since being unemployed must be a fucking nightmare. then again, a few years back .... cough cough .... my mate would not look for a job for love nor money ! we were all like wtf ?? but no, he was happy signing on, lol.
my manager phones me while i was on site today. " dD, once this contract finishes in a week or two, we basically have f/all for you, so rather than sit in the office, with your thumb up your arse, i've spoken to head office (scotland ffs) who have some work .... in Aberdeen .... " . have to admit being kinda speechless the rest of the day, sigh.
may not be too bad though. I've SOLD my house. so technically, come July, I wont need "the man" .... we could just carry on living with the mother-in-law ..... but the stress is really showing in my mrs now and its an open bet as to who she murders first .... me, mummy or the kids !
how's that for timing, sell the house, working in York (you think ? - ed) and the first job is in Aberdeen !
she has already got her eye on a new property. fair enough. i've told her if our relationship dont improve i'm vacating to the couch ! had plenty practice so no worries there lol. my complaint is she does a fair old impersonation of mrs hudson & miss jean brodie ! fml, stop doing that ffs, it drives me fucking insane !
that insanity carries over to poker. not to mention a few ales along with it. but when you've had a few, its ok to drop $10 at that table because you're $5 up on the other table ! makes perfect sense when you're half pished !
thats the worst, i've kinda accepted i'm "only" a recreational donk and so it doesn't matter if i lose, sigh. annoys the fucking life out of me though because i know if i could get half way to stability i could do so much better. hmmmm no one rocking that boat except yours truly. think if was a complete cunt and dumped her, i'd do any better ? probably spunk off the other half of my 'roll on guilt tilt !
since i changed my omaha style, i've been donating at cash 8-game ! go figure ! seems there are hoddem donkeys everywhere ! now what was that hand .... oh aye, jacks v A8 (sorry Zag, we all make mistakes) on a Jx8 flop, all the ca$h goes in .... turn, an 8, river, oh yes, an 8 .... pfffft. the ale in me decided that that would be a good time to go play higher, ho hum, boom headshot ! ah well, still have a few hundred on stars and similar on tilt and same again spread across a zillion other accounts.
you wont know it, but i've just visited the rain soaked car park .... fire alarm, sigh. guessed it was a false alarm as i stumbled across the car park and noticed a load of guests sitting in the restaurant finishing their fucking a-la-carte evening meal, bastards. when i came back in i asked reception .... yes, false alarm. the chef apparently overdid some fuckers lobster or some such nonsense.
great fire alarm. i am now technically deaf in both fucking ears.
i'm in the best western Walworth Castle Hotel. very nice. big room, en suite and a huge fuck-off lcd-tv. wall mounted of course. i'm up on the top floor, so net access is a bit ropey, but hey, who's complaining, the-man is paying. better enjoy it since it looks like this is the last jaunt off the back of the ECML job i'll be having for a while.
i think thats enough pish for one post. so taking the whole family back to EK next week. really hope Zag is playing the turbo game in glasgow at some point. by the middle of the week i will so need a break lol. ok, there's a beer with my name on it and the seat marked "donk" has been reserved.
by the by, i swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and .... post more often.
pleasant dreams.
welcome back.
A joining or acting together, as if by sinister design
we'll get back to that statement in a moment. for the time being I've admitted defeat at the 10/25. playing some stone cold sober poker has brought a few items up. the simplest of which is the way I've been playing this level. I'm quite simply not 'rolled for it. If I'm not 'rolled for it, then its pretty much a given that I'm playing scared and am very very risk averse. Waiting for that monster hand to appear and thus playing tighter than a nun's snatch. Not good at cash tables.
Conspiracy Theory (patent pending #422772277242)
Now, over the last week I have noticed something. When I raised pre, the villains are folding, leaving me high and dry, winning the blinds, thats a 60c pot, wowser. They are doing this 80% plus of the time. I know, I checked. Also, limping into a pot, then betting any street, whether thats a min bet, pot bet or all-in, the villains are folding 80% of the time. I'm talking about the regulars here btw.
I put my theory to the test .... with 6 of us seeing a flop, the board running out high, flushed and super scary, I have complete air, btw, I min bet 25c into a pot of about $4.50 .... and all 5 folded, lmfao, seriously, lmfao. There were 3 regs in the hand and I reckon the other 2 fish just thought "if they're folding against this fish, me too !"
How the fuck are you supposed to win ? (the other 20% they are holding monsters and I get royally fucked lol)
Taking the 20 buy-in rule - to play 10/25 I need $500 .... now this is where I get a tad confused .... is that $500 per table ? I suppose it is if you subscribe to the 5% rule ie no more than 5% of your 'roll in play at any one time.
So, having multiple tables opened, I was putting 30-40% of my 'roll on the line. Not good.
Last night I dropped down to the 1/2 (lol) but have changed my style of play. Just much more aggro, basically. Which is no problem, having been used to putting $25 on the line, its easy enough with only $5 behind you. Strictly speaking, I am still breaking the 5% rule .... 20 buy-ins per table says I should have a 'roll of nearly $1k if I want to seriously multi-table, lmfao, $1k indeed, I'll get there eventually !
I started off just opening all the normal speed tables, not to many, then added in some "fast" tables ..... lmfao, after only one orbit on the 3 fast tables I opened, I left ! Maybe its my age, but I just do not like the "fast" tables lol.
As the tables filled, I opened them up. Thats another thing I do not like .... short handed .... so I only sit down when the table is full.
Managed to rack up 1400 hands, net result being a loss (lol) of 37c. Trying to be more LAG than woose, I ran into a few monster hands and a few monster donks. You know the type. Call off their stack with top two and no low. So goes it I suppose. Even though its a loss, still pleased with the way I played. If said donks could have let some of those hands go it would easily have been a profitable night :)
Just to keep my hand in, so to speak and also to let the 10/25'ers know that I'm still about, I did keep one 10/25 table running. Managing just over 100 hands .... net result being a profit of $15 .... go figure. Taking my new LAG (lol) style to the bigger table obv worked !
lol it would have been a hell of a night if the villain in a $40 pot had not held A2 as I did ! However, the two villains in a $12 pot who called my river bet on a flushed AND paired board holding only 2-pair ???? I had the flush .... 4-high lmfao, you just couldn't make this up.
The other thing you can't make up is how much of a WOOSE I have been at the 10/25 .... fml, shocking, absolutely fucking shocking !!
running vp$ip 19 and pfr% 1.5 .... that really is a fucking disgrace !
Last night ....
10/25 .... vp$ip 37 and pfr 24% .... ( a world of difference )
1/2 .... .... vp$ip 26 and pfr 15% .... ( still needs some work here )
isn't PT wonderful. certainly an eye opener and, of course, it pulls no punches. not nice to read (or admit) but a real wake up call if ever there was one.
pleasant dreams.
welcome back.
and thats Happy Birthday to me, btw :)
so my descent into poker mediocrity continues apace. all my own fault. I've gotten into the very, very bad habit of having an ale or two whilst playing. 1 ale and 6 tables too many and before you know it, a buy-in or three have slowly but surely slipped from my stack whilst calling down to the river and only having the nutz one-way, lol. There are an awful lot (!) of nut-nut peddlars at 10/25, I need to join 'em, or the whole 'roll will slowly but surely slip their way.
So, join me tonight, with my last poker playing ale in hand (its my birthday ffs !!) and basically enjoy the last of my "free" donations. I'll be donking along at the usual omaha tarbs and of course, the world famous britBlogger !! all welcome, password up there on the left hand side.
lets lighten the mood before i go ....
YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2010 when...
1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave..
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you...
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses .
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.
7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.
10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.
11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )
12.. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.
14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.
15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list.
AND NOW YOU ARE LAUGHING AT YOURSELF !
My grandad gave me some sound advice on his deathbed..
"It's worth spending money on good speakers," he told me.
My wife says it's disgusting to piss in the bath.
I suppose I should wait until she gets out.
A woman brings eight-year-old Johnny home and tells his mother that he was caught playing doctors and nurses with Mary, her eight-year-old daughter.
Johnny's mother says, "Let's not be too harsh on them.... they are bound to be curious about sex at that age."
"Curious about sex?" replies Mary's mother. "He's taken her fucking appendix out !"
Disabled toilets.
Ironically, the only toilets big enough to run around in.
I had a mate who was suicidal.
He was really depressed, so I pushed him in front of a steam train.
He was chuffed to bits..
pleasant dreams.
welcome back.
just re-read the post from a couple back .... guess what ? yeah, that's exactly what I've been doing, sigh. yeesh, what a load of tosh, huh ?
at least the poker is going well .... as in a fucking deep well. my dance with the variance bitch continues. i suppose if you step back and take a look, it must be quite amusing, in a sad kind of way. win win win for several nights at sites other than stars, where i have tiny bankrolls, lol.
hit up on stars (main bankroll) and start giving it away for practically free !
that's why I'm posting, actually. after dropping a couple of buy-ins on Saturday night (again) .... well, over the past few months, every time i hit stars, I've been slowly but surely destroying my 'roll. now i could have been on here posting once or twice a week, real whiny-bitch posts, bemoaning my "luck", the apparent non-RNG and generally getting rivered left right and fucking center.
I'm also big enough to know I've been playing pretty poorly.
I've also been prone to the tilt-monster. my personal tilt-monster is the gambling one, aka getting it all-in pre-flop. I don't care what anyone says, all-in pre in omaha8 is gambling of the worst variety.
the one shining beacon was my result in the big buy-in at the end of February.
i played in the $100+$9 pl08b game .... blagging 5th for $850 ....
should have been a minimum of 4th but I misclicked and called a river bet (on the final table, ughh) with J-fucking-high .... that's what the astonished villain asked .... "did you just call me with jack high ?" .... don't think he could believe his luck on that one. I mean, i had the chip lead on the final table at one point ffs.
so I know i can play, if i don't give it away for free !!
which brings me to last night and why I'm actually posting something, which hopefully isn't too whiny bitchy.
decided last night, enough is enough. get a grip son and stop giving it away.
so i did. and actually got a decent return on stars. a very welcome +$107 and a redic amount of fpp's, something like 400 leaving 25 to get my silver star back, lol. (that $ amount equals 428 bb's btw :) (now that sounds a lot lmfao :)
now i know its not a huge amount but it is a HUGE morale booster. and I dare say, like so many things in life, if you don't approach it with confidence, then you're half way beat before the game kicks off. so, small pat on the back to me and "don't give it away for free".
oh and last night, as well, i blagged 3rd in the britBlogger for a 50c return lol.
pleasant dreams.
welcome back.
the song rattling about in my head at the mo "i've got a feeling, tonights gonna be a good night" courtesy of the BEP :) man, that Fergie is soooo hot, whew ! got a biggy tonight thanks to the fine folks over at pokerplayersplace, who came up with an idea to allow us wee fish a shot at a big one. its a pyramid scheme, members contribute $$ each week, thus allowing one member per week, a buy-in to a biggie of their choice. my shot is tonight, gulp :)
most peeps play nlhe, of course. 40k guaranteed, 60k guaranteed etc etc. I had a look at these, but the playing time if you go deep is 6hrs plus, ugh ! needless to say i dont really have that much to spare, never mind the concentration required lol. so i'll be playing something with slightly less runners tyvm.
oh quad goddesses of poker, dont allow me to make myself gigli.
apart from that, not a lot happening, poker wise ;) been donking about at purpleLounge, recovering a very very fragile bankroll, now that i'm paying attention to the € buy-in ! so over the $50 and still, generally, heading North, so all's goot :)
I see Scotland got beat, again, at the rugby :( shouldn't surprise me really, but after trouncing Wales 2 weeks ago for 70mins .... then gifting victory to them in the last 10 .... painful !
oh and the very best of luck to the boys in blue in tomorrows tiny wee local derby, up here in the West of Scotland :)
whatever you're playing tonight, good luck !
pleasant dreams.
welcome back.
lmfao. my 3 year old has just wandered through to where the pc sits in the hall .... and pointed out, in 3 year old speak, daddy has not fixed the lamp he broke yet, has he ? said "lamp" is the hallway light, hanging from the ceiling, which i "broke" when i changed the shade. its a really old light fitting and it was only coming down if i actually broke the rose .... honestly, the things 3 year old's notice !
not been about much because i spend way to much time "working". ok so almost half my week is spent travelling but by the time i get home at night etc etc the last thing i feel like doing is sitting down and banging out a post .... ffs, when would i get to play poker ?
ah the life of a high flying micro-micro stakes player ! fucking exciting, huh ?
so what's been happening ....
not much lol due to time spent elsewhere. still donking about on purple lounge, but as any microstaker knows, its a long long grind for very little return. since i fucked up with the buy-in currency, i 've been grinding 50c and €1 turbo tourneys, managing to get the roll back to $50 from less than $10 lmfao. actually, i'm quite pleased with the way it's going :)
also been taking a shot over on Party .... get this, at one point last night, excluding money in play, i had 13c left in my account ! managed to cash the last 3 tourneys of the night, bring my roll to a very respectable $30 ! ha ha ha .... reckon i can squeeze 5 tourneys out of that. sorry, but i really cannot be arsed with the 3-dollar buy-ins. too much like grinding and Party is a dial-a-shot roll, so wtf !!
i really should get some sort of schedule together, sort of like jones keeps threatening lol. not his buy-ins ffs ! I mean, like play 08 on stars and grind the fuck out of it every 2nd or 3rd night. then on my "off" nights i should just donk about at the micro's on whatever site takes my fancy, because i've actively been avoiding stars since my pre-crimbo stellar bad run :(
and we all know, sigh, I should know, its a long term game.
pleasant dreams.
welcome back.
heard it yowling. ignored it. went out the back for a smoke. heard it yowling, out front, i thought ..... unlocks the gate, goes outside for a look .....
across the road, i see him, a fox, lying down, yowling in pain ....
i step forwards .... he sits up a little .... a car approaches .... it passes .... pulls into the drive across the street .... my taxi driver neighboor gets out .... looks at me .... "wtf are you doing ?" i see him think .... the fox, in pain, i almost voice ....
he goes into his house .... the fox yowls .... i take a step towards it ....
mr foxy stands up .... and trots off down the street .... bastard !!!!
in pain my arse ! and now my neighbour thinks i am a loon, wtf ?
grrrr. you know, i really wish you had never, ever, mentioned that fucking fox .... zagga
pleasant dreams.
welcome back.
Hello ResdentEvil,
Thank you for participating in WBCOOP 2010 - we hope you enjoyed the experience!
This is just a quick email to inform you that you have been credited $1.58 from the player 'MI_Turtle'. He kindly offered to share $1000 amongst all the players that outlasted him in the WBCOOP Main Event. His final finishing position of 635th place meant the $1000 was divided between the top 634 players.
If you have any questions regarding this unusual prize, please let us know.
Regards,
The WBCOOP Team
well played, sir. and thank you very much.
oh and thank-you to my "followers". i'd forgotten all about that wee widget lurking at the bottom of the blog ! cheers guys & gals :)
i wonder if the mobile phone operators actually make more money from texts rather than actual phone calls !!
IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT
Does your wife or girlfriend have any unwanted gold jewellery ? Rings, Earings, Bracelets ?
If so ....
....
....
....
....
.... give her a fucking slap ! Ungrateful cunt !!
and of course, the obligatory Glesga humour.
Locals are said to be in a state of shock after Police found a stash of guns behind the library in Coatbridge yesterday.
A spokeman said "The people of Coatbridge had no idea they had library"
pleasant dreams *)
welcome back.
mrO - was a good one. awaiting confirmation of Newcastle dates :)
mrK - 6 hands ? we only counted 4 lol
YP - he is an animal ! pl08b on hold !
Mair - might even get a chance to chat next one ! whatever happened to theRegulators ?
DF - 6 minimum !!
i dont know, but between freerolls ($2k added and $250second chance) and now the wbcoop, i've hardly played a hand of omaha8 on stars, meh. a welcome distraction but, of course, it does fuck all for the bankroll or fpp's !
also been fannying about on purpleLounge .... i did put a small amount on there .... played about 5 tourneys and when i checked, the roll had plummeted to $7 ... wtf ? seriously wtf ?
next time you buy into a tourney, make sure you KNOW what currency the buy-in refers too .... oops :(
so obv i have been buying in to the €1 stt's now .... ground it back up to just over $20, small potatoes i know. but i'm like that, i wanna prove i can make some moola (silly bastard - Ed) lmfao i know, its not worth it playing stt's under $10.
in fact, the only "serious" play i've been doing is on fullTilt. been kind of "grinding" the $1 and $2 pl08b tourneys, one or two tables, whatever fills first. been doing v well .... roll up over the hundred mark .... then i ran into (more like run over by) "rush" .... ha ha why do i not stick to what i am "good" at ? just for the record, i actually booked a $6 profit on "rush" last night before the freeroll donkery began. yes yes at the $10 level before someone makes a smartarse comment.
thats enough bull for one day, I have a freeroll (2-off !) to mentally prepare for !!
welcome back.
welcome back.
when you beat the bloggers, what can you do but blog *)
welcome back.
thanks guys, all the very best for 2010 to you all.
as far as poker goes, that's exactly what I've been doing :) i now have a whopping 6 tickets to my name.
lack of sleep and way too much alcohol abuse :) over the festive season has left me somewhat drained. oh and a man size dose of man-flu :(
no way am i playing the cash tables feeling like this ! hopefully come the weekend i will be more rested and might even feel like playing for serious .... pocket money :)
my new years res (:dentevil:) .... less alcohol, less smokes, more sex .... ha ha ha ! the only one left i might achieve is alcohol abuse = no poker .... no alcohol = poker, simples.
oh and sorry for my non-appearance at the britBlogger (i know you all love free chips !) but i have been chat-banned, so what was the point ? hopefully i'll return this coming Sunday .... all things not equalling senility (thanks Foxy:)
oh, one final poker point .... playing a 111 runner turbo top 9 get a ticket .... with 10 left i push with AKo and get called by A2s .... wtf ? he had me out chipped 3-1 .... a fucking 2 on the turn .... and I'm out as bubble-fucking-boy .... now that did piss me off !
so i said, quote " **** *** " unquote .... bastard !!
pleasant dreams.
welcome back
pleasant dreams
not pretty at all
you really could not do this if you tried.
the laptop was on the floor, i tipped it up to look at the screen, my son wandered over to see what i was up to, and dropped the watch .... which caught the screen a glancing blow .... doh !
a new screen is £90 if you fancy a bit of DIY ....
and then there is poker. very first hand on my first table, thought this regular could take a joke, as we have chatted in the past, obv not, wanker.
so its my bb and he jams his small stack in, about 20bb or something. this is how this regular plays, always. so it was no surprise. i fold.
so i say "lol f/off maggot, merry christmas mate" (maggot is part of his username, btw)
within 30secs there is a mod at the table typing all the usual stuff about abuse etc etc. I never even payed any attention to this at all and only when i tried to chat and the "your chat privilege's have been revoked" box pops up, does it dawn on me, the mod was there because of me ....
their email says i'm chat banned for a week lmfao, oh the irony !! just as well i missed the britBlogger :(
the flip side of the coin, i blagged a 4th place in the 10c/360's .... hah ! get it up you 'stars !
pleasant dreams.
welcome back.
my phone memory woes continues ....
dear madam, your application to join our match making service has been rejected.
you failed question 14 "what do you like best in a man ?"
"A knife" was not an acceptable answer.
very brave Man jokes ....
how do you turn a fox into an elephant ? .... marry it !
what is the difference between a battery and a woman ?
a battery has a positive side.
why is the space between a woman's breasts and her hips called a waist ?
because you could easily fit another pair of tits in there.
why did God create woman ?
to carry semen from the bedroom to the toilet.
classix ....
quick emergency tip, if you get snowed in.
you can turn your dishwasher into a snowplough .... by giving her a shovel.
sic ....
a bloke rings up work and says to his boss "i cant come in today I'm sick"
his boss says "how sick ?"
he replies, "well I'm in bed with my disabled sister !"
and a Christmas cracker ....
this Christmas, lets put mistletoe in our back pockets, so all the people who hate us can kiss our fucking arse.
ahh, the Glesga patter ....
wife asks husband "what shall i wear to the party ? would you like to see me in something long and flowing ?"
husband replies " aye, the fucking Clyde !"
Merry Christmas all.
pleasant dreams
welcome back.
seems i was just bitch of the week, lol. gone, but not forgotten.
poker continues to be pffft, any change, i'll let you know. i think i'll just continue to donk about in micro-land until my new year res kicks in, then its onwards and upwards .... or busto ????
btw the 10c/360's are actually quite funny, some of the all-ins .... class.
so far i've blagged 9th.27th.29th.20th.10th.36th.8th.25th. .... from about 10000 *)
on a slightly different note, i played the daily dollar rebuy on 'tilt last week, managing 311th of 4590 runners, not bad.
and 17th of 160 runners in one of my old favourite $3 war HORSE :)
and 97th of 869 runners in the $3 pl08b
i have a crappy ol' (works) phone and it seems the "memory" is full, lmfao, 90 texts and its fukked. so might as well dump the best ones ? on here. well, they made me smile, mostly :)
when Bob was asked if he preferred legs or breasts he said that he had a particular fondness for shaven fannies.
He was then informed this wasn't an option when choosing a KFC bargain bucket.
a man walks into a bar and sees this gorgeous woman and says "I'd love to get into your knickers"
she replied " i've already got one arsehole in there thanks ! "
scientific studies show 99% of men would like to be a tablecloth.
its the only fucking chance they get of being laid 3 times a day and pulled off last thing at night.
Vicar books into a hotel. Says to the receptionist " I do hope the porn channel is disabled. "
she replies " No, its just normal porn, you sick bastard "
classic ....
One day, a long time ago, in a land far far away, there lived a woman who did not nag, whine or bitch.
But it was just one day and a fucking long time ago.
pleasant dreams.
welcome back.
its been a while so i thought i'd better knock one out but i decided to write a post instead ....
apparently, i am a certain degenerates bitch. what the fuck that entails, i have no idea .... do i bail him out financially ..... do i give him life enhancing advice .... or do i just blow him ....
not been aboot for a while, 'stars continues to be a complete fucking rollercoaster, not exactly what i want at this time of year. sure, i keep running into monster hands, made or otherwise, but fuck me, it does bleech the confidence factor right out of you !
speaking of such, i have been away for 5 days, i get back, she says "hi" .... wtf ????
bearing in mind, she is wearing a top you could park your fucking bike in, she is a trophy, she is indeed one mighty fucking fine looking MILF .... and "hi" .... wtf, seriously, wtf.
((not sure if its the milkman or one of the local farmers .... but it is certainly not fucking me))
any wonder i drink beer and play pokher .... seems i have fuck all else to do, pfffft.
aye, so, getting royally fucked at the felt, not so royally fucked away from it, pffft. decided to give stars a rest and just donk about in general ..... anyone remember Zelda, lol, yeah i have an old n64 gathering dust :) well, there is only so much internet fucking porn you can take in a week :))
so inbetween Zelda i am donking about in el-cheapo donk-em land .... (360)10c turbs :)
for my benefit, i played 12 tonight, including beer, and it ended ....
327,95,95,124,142,59,183,68,95,49,38 and last game i blag 8th.
ha fucking ha, so thats one itm .... guess what my new year resolution is ????
pleasant dreams.
welcome back.
over the last 2 weeks i have been beaten fucking senseless by the stars RNG. i also tend to find, when this happens, i don't play particularly well, so its a double whammy !! from a high of over $800 i hit the lows of $690 odds, wtf ? seriously wtf !!!!
[ the jammy bastard has gotten it all back and is on the right side of $800 - Ed ]
two weeks ago was smallestChilds birthday :) booked the day off .... but .... on the preceding night middleChild starts sicking up .... no biggie .... unless its half eleven at night and they are in bed .... ugh .... what a fucking mess !
this continues through the night, every hour or there abouts, fml !
the mrs decides this might be a good time to throw a sicky herself, wtf ? she spends half the night in the loo, fml.
middleChild stops throwing up about 9 next morning .... birthday morning, sigh .... about 10, i kneel down in front of the birthday girl, who is looking a wee bit wabbit .... BARF !!!! .... i am extremely extremely glad i had my mouth closed .... ugh .... what a fucking mess .... how i never caught their bug is beyond me !!
was supposed to be heading North of the border last weekend, see friends & family etc, etc .... err, no. due to the slightly inclement weather, trip postponed, sigh.
i run so good, huh ?
so i am heading North of the border this weekend .... err, no.
lunchtime today, i get a call from her mum, she aint well at all ! cant get out of bed, neighbour has taken oldestChild to school, middleChild is off school, hacking & coughing all over the fucking place, and good ole' mother-in-law has had to take a day off work to look after the kids !
so i get away from work and eventually get home to find the mrs still in bed with suspected swine flu !
so i have to head off to Boston (Lincs not Mass, btw) to get some damned tamiflu .... two fucking hours it took for a round trip of 20 miles, fml ! that town at 4pm friday afternoon is a fucking drivers nightmare !
i am soooo looking forward to the weekend, sigh.
the thought of playing on stars is almost comforting, almost.
pleasant dreams.
welcome back.
played the britBlogger last night. what a hoot, up to a point :)
at my table i had badcallthat, Ca$hPredator, joppa-roadand his would-be-bitch (we'll come back to these two:), noCash and the Katitude. the delightful Mair would join us soon enough, along with Kronsdat .... not sure if that was before or after StanStanTheTaxi man decided he wanted theMonkey to have another week in the fair city of Edinburgh .... two weeks on the trot .... record ? .... same fcuking house .... record ?!!!!
The star attraction would show up later :)
now, at the time the banter started between JoppaRoad and WouldBe, i thought they were buddies ! not quite, so it would seem. an stars sat them next to each other, fcuking ace move right there !!
wouldBe "$50 bounty to JR if he can get into the knickers of any woman under the age of 60"
wouldBe "and an extra $25 if she weights less than 14 stone"
as per fucking usual, I misread the sign.
jopparoad "who's d1ck did you suck to get entry for this ?"
wouldBe "at $1 a go i had to suck more than one"
ah the britBlogger, such a fun, friendly, family game :)
I've started reading both their blogs, it aint fucking pretty, but it is pretty interesting. Kudos to both of them for their honesty.
Hell, i even have a cameo on wouldBe's blog, ha ha too funny. left a comment and his reply quite surprised me ! well played sir !
so these two degenerate gamblers are involved in a challenge .... hope they both do well, actually, and manage to keep hold of whatever they win .... remember guys, Bankroll Management :)
not long after, the table broke and i found myself sitting with these fish .... weegem not long for Falkirk eh ? ya jammy git !! BM, Daleroxxu, rchpro, sword-skillz defending champ .... could anyone oust him ? , Neil Ross and theCloud ....
so we banter along for a while, the fish all 3-betting each other left right and centre, then it happened ..... daleroxxu sets the tone for the entrance of the star attraction .....
daleroxxu goes all-in over weegem's initial raise .... AT v AK .... a ten on the flop sends weegem packing :(
so its all his fault for giving the idea to the stars RNG :)
so down to 2 tables, i'm now sat with -
SWORD-SKILLZ, badcallthat, Ca$hPredator, Al Eleven, rchpro, Joppa Rd, NoCash25 and Katitude
now as i recall, AlEleven had three hammers that i saw and got paid ! pushing fishes off post flop, nice :) the RNG had one last laugh before it went into overdrive .... my AA was good against AQ ....
first to go was joppa-road with KQ vTT .... he hit the straight on the river, badcall hit the boat, ouch.
then Ca$hPredator 88 no good against Al's QQ, gg but nae luck.
then, A3o v QQ .... Al Eleven v SWORD-SKILLZ, nae luck sword, its Al your playing, wow, Ace on the flop
and that was my downfall, folded AK pre, to the heavy betting, fucking woose, there was also a K on the flop too :(
rchpro sent Katitude to the rail, his 66 good v AJ
so 5 handed, bubble for the final table, and i push with 99 ... Al calls with AKs ....
*** FLOP *** [4d Tc 5h]*** TURN *** [4d Tc 5h] [Js]*** RIVER *** [4d Tc 5h Js] [Qc]
what a surprise ! good game me. actually thought i had a chance until the J appeared ....
now i obv don't have the hh, but from here on in, big stak Al Eleven got aggro, and anytime he got looked up, he called the all-in .... he got in behind on so many occasions i thought he'd started batting for the other team !!
lmfao, n1 Al Eleven, pleasure to see you at the felt again, and after kicking my ass, a real pleasure to watch you go on and win, the luckboxery you displayed was even better than our last home game, fucking outstanding big man !!
Al Eleven will be back next week to defend. surely not 2 in a row, again ....
pleasant dreams.
welcome back.
dropped $10 tonight ....
shouldn't be too hard on myself, first time for every thing ....
i turned quads .... wheeeeeeee .... no low, but who gives a fuck :)
he rivered a straight flush .... oh fml
so what the fuck do you call a straight flush 5-high ....
surely not ? .... a straight wheel .... can't be ....
sigh, fml (no fucking bad beat jackpot either, you bastard)
damn, i'm tired !
pleasant dreams.
welcome back, gentle reader.
welcome back, gentle reader.
