Tuesday, 26 June 2007

Pugh! Pugh! Barney McGrew! Cuthbert! Dibble! Grubb! (part 2 )

welcome back, gentle reader, welcome back

the "conversation" with the policeman took place at the bottom of the stairs. Scott then shot off to mrs dD, complaining bitterly that I had not let him talk on the phone. I siezed the opportunity and shot off to the bathroom ... locking the door behind me ... and had a long, cool shower. Giving me time to reflect upon the ingenuity of children. Scott is not quite 5 years old and Callum has just turned 3 :)
Dear sweet Hannah, your formative years will certainly be ... interesting !!
After showering, I slip quietly upstairs and get dressed, heading back downstairs with a rueful smile on my face. I know fine well that there is now going to be a "conversation" with mrs dD and I don't think my 27o is gonna crack her bullets.
I pick up the pace and breeze into the living room, heading for the kitchen, she looks up and gives me the look ... I feel my smile fading, stopping in my tracks without conscious thought ... bugger

mrs dD - well ?
dD - what ?
mrs dD - you know ... the phone call ... well ?
dD - hmmm ... phone call ? ( I look innocently at the landline phone in the corner )
smiling mrs dD - hmmm ... yes .... the one on your mobile ... earlier ... this morning

and now the mood insta changes ... suddenly I am 5 years old ...

mrs dD - well, was it the police ?
dD - ah well yes ... see ...
mrs dD - calling about phantom 999 calls ?
dD - ah well yes ... see ...
mrs dD - Callum was down here an hour ago, telling me that Scott was calling the police
dD - oh ... oh ... did he ... oh ...
Callum - see daddy ! I told mummy ... Scott had phone ... calling policeman !!
Scott sits quietly, grinning from ear to ear, looking well pleased with himself, the cat thats got the cream :)
mrs dD - are they sending someone here ?
dD - no, no ... not this time ....
mrs dD - just as well, you would have been the one answering the door ...

she flashes me that look, dismissed daddy, conversation terminated.

I shake my head dejectedly and slope off to the kitchen, seeking a cup of tea that will lift my spirits. After all, the whole of this mornings shenanigans, laid firmly and squarely on my doorstep, ho hum.


The Edge said...

Wow. You must have been bricking it. There have been stories about fines people get from abusing those numbers. Though a lot of them are from stupid people, such as a woman calling for directions when she'd got lost.

My mate called 999 to get some coppers round when a peasant attacked him the other day. The switchboard was faulty, so my buddy had to memorise the local station's number, and then call it. While enduring a torrent of verbal, alcohol fueled, abuse!

The Edge.

BurnleyMik said...

You handled it with dignity mate and were very lucky the police did not get involved, as Edge says they are pretty strict on that kind of thing these days!



Kenn said...

thats some funny shit mate

especailly the missus dD giving you the dismissal look - damn missus has the same tihng wonder if they get together and practise that shit!!

Rosie said...

We don't get need to get together and practice - we learn it *in utero*
Such is the preparation for a life where we have to deal with the disappointment in the menfolk, I'm afraid.